It's time to think about my fursona hanging out with my ocs. These lyrics are lightly rewritten to be about my ocs, but the actual Metal Gear Plot parts are the same. For now. If I am very brave, I might completely rewrite them to be Sage's actual plot.
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Hello, and welcome back to another episode of "Talking Original Characters".
*clapping*
We continue today in our series of OCs with simple plots. Guests, please introduce yourselves and tell us the plots of your stories.
I'm Xiphoid, from Robots ♡! I fix-a the robots :]
*clapping*
Hello, I'm Day. I just kinda walk around the town.
*clapping*
Hey, I'm Sage from The Sages. My story's got a pretty simple plot...
Sage, I don't see your name on the list...
Oh, my boss Azzy told me to come on this show and talk about it-
Oh god no.
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It was the distant future, two thousand and five
All I wanted to do was chill out and retire
But genetically enhanced renegades named Foxhound
Stole a bunch of nukes and had shit on lockdown
Okay, we're past our time limit, Sage!
Colonel Campbell said I had to infiltrate
Before they start a nuclear conflict
What a bunch of jerks!
You're a bag of dicks.
I climbed through an airvent and saved two guys
Who shared top secrets and suddenly died
Of two heart attacks right out of thin air
Both within five minutes!
Oh my god, I don't care!
Then I met Meryl, a hot box of rocks
And I found a gunslinger named Ocelot
But a cyborg ninja cut his hand away
Y'know, normal shit that happens everyday.
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Listen, Sage, there must've been a mistake. On this show, you've gotta get right to the point of your plot.
Like this blaze from Origins
(Lord): Hi, I do stuff in Minecraft?
Or CanCan from the dance furries
I'm a cat! :D
That's great!
You know, we've been through this before with your boy Azzy, and he talked so long I contemplated ending my life.
So let't keep things nice and simple, like the hero over there, from the Dragon Crew story!
(Jack): I'm literally just an emo teen!
Who cares!
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I tried really hard to find a mech named Rex
And the ninja came back in the mix like Chex
It was Gray Fox and I fought Vulvan Raven
A big motherfuckin' Alaskan shaman
So I killed that guy, but before he died
He said Meryl liked me, I almost cried!
She's a little hottie pants, ohh-meow!
It would be so great if you died right now.
I killed Sniper Wolf, who was absurdly hot
And then murdered three guys and an evil robot
'Til Liquid Snake and I were left alone
He said that I was his brother and a superior clone
Then he died of a virus and thinking fast, Meryl saved us!
I don't give a frog's fat ass!
Then we stayed together until the seven year itch
And now you know the simple plot of Metal Gear, bitch!
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Listen, Sage, I've taken all I can take. Just because a story's simple doesn't mean that it's lame.
Tell them, Sid from Tree Cowboys.
Yo, I deliver that cowboy stuff!
And Pat the DnD character.
uh, fire.
Okay!
Dear god- Why can't I just have a simple panel of guests, who can say their plots in forty fuckin' minutes of less?
Now just watch me Sage before you make me reach for a gun, I'll summarize your story and show you how this shit is really motherfuckin' done!
*very epic part*
You die and do ghost murders, THE END! My god, can I get a replacement guest with a simple plot please?