basics is: LEDD is the host, then contestants left to right go Moe, Rat, Ollie. yeah i wrote out this entire video like a script. why not.
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Live from the abandoned prison of Alcatraz, somewhere in the New York peninsula, it's Geo-pardy!
dude, I love Marvel, let's go!
yeah!
...
Coming in at 200lbs, it's Ollie!
Hi.
Only knee-high to a frog, it's Rat.
Y'all, what's good?
And this guy, who's the closest thing to a perect sphere we could find in the entire universe, Moe.
They're 5 days old.
That's right, just born!
And they have one hundred thousand dollars in their bank account.
Woo! They ain't gonna give me that.
Oh, a member of the one percent, I see.
Now here's your host... LEDD!
.
Hello everybody, and welcome again to Jeopardy!
We're looking at this guy pull on their funny little necklace, and we're all really proud of them.
They're only five days old, they made that in preschool.
Really exciting stuff. From. Moe.
Now, coming in from somewhere- I don't actually know the locations of these people-
is Rat and Ollie who I don't care as much about because they're not five days old.
I'm very much a children's person.
But uhhhh, check out my squares!
Good squares.
"What College"
"That's Admissable"? What?
What does that mean? I don't know what that means, but you're gonna have to figure it out.
"The Farmer."
"Adele"
.
What do you think?
Uhh... Let me get 'dat one, Steve.
That's not- I'm LEDD but-
"To- To walk at a slow-" W- whu?
What are "three mice in a trench coat"?
That's exactly right, you win 600-
Uh, I'll take "Adele" for 200.
"This figure of speech can be seen as- brief as a breeze."
Uh-
Fuckin' idiot
What is "a Lunchables™ pizza"?
That's- That's right, you-
I'll take "Adele" for 200.
You gotta let me finish these sentences.
"Dreary is a synonym for this six-letter word, also know as-" yes?
Choppers doctoring.
Yep, yeah, you got it.
Ya-yo. Ya-yo ya-yo.
"You're dropping these coins, you're dropping them all over the ground. You have to start picking them up."
She didn't say "what is," I just buzzed in to-
You're right.
I just wanted to say, she didn't say "what is."
That's two hundred dollars out of her wallet, going into yours.
This is fucked.
"A maiden of birth is-" Wh- huh-
What is "Adele for 200"?
That's right again.
I'll take "Adele" for 200.
"The capital's name comes from the original Spanish settlement, Santa Fe Badela De."
What is happening? How about that. Can I-
That's exactly right.
Can I get "Adele" for 2000?
Nope.
What the fuck?
Look at Stonewall. It gave us our rights.
... I think about it.
You did a great job, buddy!
Thank you. What- Give me the-
DOUBLE DAILY
Wow, you have to think about it so much now. Twice as much!
Wow, I- I gotta think.
We have now put the floating cube next to your head.
Don't look at it, or it'll kill you. Be careful!
What is...
Wrong!
"Cincinatti"?
Oh, actually, that's right.
Nah, you fuckin' idiot, I'm just kidding.
Nice one. Bozo. Embarrassing yourself on live TV.
I'll take "Adele" for 200.
You can't have it!
"The Chilean city of Ca-lamb-a is in this desert." How about take that one, idiot?
Hey. What is "The Dimmadome"?
Yeah! That's right! Finally piping the fuck up, Moe!
Yeah, well, give me that one. Stop talkin'.
Nope. "Containing planting sched-" What the? "...Astronauts"?
Ay, what is "a planter"?
I don't know, have six hundred dollars.
"Some farmers have cow feed grown from plants called G- muh mm. Short for this."
What is "my mother's real name"?
I don't know, but we'll give you-"
I'll take "Adele" for 200.
You can't have. It.
"The Feudalism of Villain, badoodalism, tenant farmer tied, Hereditary is a great movie. Plot of land!"
I've never seen Hereditary, was it good?
No. Shut up.
I'll take "Adele" for 2...
"Last name of Johnathan and Martha, Kansas farmers who famously adopted a boy from very far away."
Ay.
What-
What is: can you just give him Adele?
Shut the hell up. Oh my God.
Alright, well, let me get Adele.
No.
"Animal farm opens with this owner of the manor f- uh- farm-"
Why won't you give any of us Adele?
Because! This is not a fun game! This is a battle to the death!
It's supposed to be- It's Jeopardy and now our rights are in jeopardy.
I'm putting you in jeopardy if you don't shut the hell up.
If you want to stop disrespecting me, maybe I'll give you Adele, but you have to play my game-
After this commercial break!
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I love products and services!
I'm calling HR.
I've teleported to the middle of the stage.
I'm getting fucking my ass whooped.
Look at this fucking loser.
I can't believe I'm getting my ass whooped this bad.
I hate everything about this-
CHIP AND DALE?
I- I'm being cursed by Chip and Dale, currently, right now, and
All of my knowledge has been erased and been replaced with Disney+.
Well, my cubes have magical properties. That was the Chip and Dale cube.
Now, let's check out this smaller and more thin cube that I'm holding in my hand.
You look at it? See it? It says Jeopardy on it.
It look like it tastes like raisins. I'd love a bite if you'd- allow me, but.
You never let me have anything I want.
That's correct.
"My rights are in Jeopardy" is what I said earlier, but.
I said that more of as a joke at the time, but now I kinda mean it! Ha ha ha.
And the joke is your freedom!
And what about you, Moe? You're looking like a snack over there.
Well, I was born 5 days ago with magnets in my hands, and I can't lift it off the podium, it's really hard, I can sway back and forth-
That's about it. It's kinda crazy- see, I can lift my hand a little biQt
but not for long, it goes right back down. It's actually kinda insane.
See, I can't get both my hands off here at the same time, I tryin-
OH MY GOD, I just did it!
Ohhh!
This is actually kinda amazing.
Woah!
I just want you to know, I'm kinda dripped out right now. This is what's allowing me to lift my hands up, just a centimeter.
See that? Just a little bit.
We'll be re-engaging the magnets now.
That's to make sure that you don't escape! You're our fastest runner here, and so we have to put the magnets in your hands.
Oh, well, let me just get that "Adele" then, if you're gonna keep me here.
Okay! For 800, "Adele won an Oscar for her song from this 2012 James Bond Movie."
What the fuck do you want.
What is "Uptown Funk"?
Yes, that's right.
I'll take "Adele" for 200.
Wrong- Oh- Oh my God!
HAHA. YES!
No! He bested me!
YES!
Oh, Jesus Christ!
(demonic) I'M FREE! I'M FREE! YOU WILL NEVER CONTAIN ME AGAIN. MY SOUL IS FREE! MY SOUL IS-
I- I'm scared, I-
You threw my entire groove off, oh my God, there is a demon in the studio. Holy shit.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NIGHTMARE?
400 dollars, don't-
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RE-LIVE IT?
This is not Adele!
Uhh. What is "you gotta say his name backwards to banish him"?
Uh, "In 2015, listeners were greeted by this song, the first single from Adele's album '25'."
It's a great number.
What is "Anaconda"?
Shut your dumb ass up, shut the fuck up.
1000 dollars.
Thank you.
"This college in New Hampshire is part of the-" What?
Uh- BI-LO.
Yeah, okay.
No.
...Die.
... Yes. Yes ma'am.
400 dollars. "It's faculty are also tenured at Columbia University," I don't know.
Who is "Jesus Christ"?
I don't know! 400 dollars from you-
Who is "Jesus. Christ"?
You know. I'm giving you the 400 dollars I took from him.
What the fuck!
"Seven Sisters School, the pride of Po-keepsies."
What is "Pokémon"?
Yeah, that's right!
"Portland school once tagged as a red hotbed, because its name was wrongly associated with-"
... What are you looking at.
(buzzer sound)
What the fuck are you looking at? Stop looking at me.
"On October 7th, 1995, this Pope scout. Was the. Bope scout."
(choking noises)
Are you okay?
(coughing, gasping) what is "oregon"?
I think we need a medic over here? (laughing)
give me the cathedral. i need christ.
Do we need help?
Here- Pray it away! Pray it away!
Pray it away! Pray it away! Say a prayer right now!
Amen.
god help me please (more coughing)
There is no God here. Sorry. Only 600 dollars.
Hi Moe!
May you be, uh. Free from pain, sister.
Aww, that's so nice!
Go ahead and give me-
"This pop artist went to Mass many times a week, and on April 1st, 1987, he played a nasty prank on the public!"
What is "mass-eez nuts"?
Yeah... You got it :( Here's 1000 dollars.
"This traditional series of 14 images at St. Patrick's won prizes artwork at the ni- (descends into nonsense and growling)"
Try answering that one, idiot. I didn't even finish the question.
(buzzer sound)
You fucking morons, look at you. There's nothing behind those stupid little eyes.
"Windows to the soul"? Windows to these nuts. I hate you fucking people.
There's no thoughts penetrating me from those eyes.
.
Everybody welcome back to my cube collection!
"Diseases."
"Some legal A's." I'm trying to get some "legal A's", if you know what I mean.
"One-Named Oscar"
"Adjectives"
uhhh ehmm ohh- I'm not saying words, hold on.
Alright. "Atlas shrugged and that was it!"
Damn, he's confused?
True!
Can I get "Atlas" for 800?
"The experimental 'Finnegan's Wake'!"
Uh, what iddis "Finnegan's Middegan"?
Biddigan, diggidan, diggidum, bitibidin.
Alright, go ahead and give me the next one-
THE DAILY DOUBLE
Woahh!
Alright, here comes the floating cube next to your head!
Don't forget, don't look at it!
uhh I'll try not to.
Alright, here it comes.
"the reveries died for your sins. you will never see-"
Uh, what is "a Big Mac double combo"?
You scared it away. Great work!
You've forgotten it, you've remembered all of the- the Earthly. vices.
Oh, you punished me for that? Ffrick you.
1600 dollars. "This German finished with a- glass. bead. and he came."
Who is "Shakespeare"?
.. Fuck you.
Fuck my life.
Now, if these idiots will stop rambling nonsense-
Alright, well, go ahead and give me the next one.
"Her 1876 work, 'Daniel Deronda'."
Who is "Kanye West"? :)
And not Donda! 4000 dollars.
Hell yeah. Can I get "Diseases"? FUCK.
"He won Best Song Score for 'Panini Danini-'"
Oh, that's definitely "Panini"!
Wrong! Shut up.
You're right actually, I'm sorry. 800 dollars.
"Eminem. Meminemineminem. Cawfully hot, coffee cock."
Uh, what is "five scoops of raisins"?
Yeah, five- seven scoops of raisins for you. 1200 dollars.
"This comedian was U-nique when she-"
Why is there an apostrophe there? We're gonna fire somebody for this one.
Uh, what is "Monique"?
Okay, you can have it, I guess! I wasn't paying attention.
"One-named designer Remiél. Won for costume design on the 18- 60- 93- fine- Egyptian lady one-named. one-man."
Uh, what is "I pooped my pants"?
Really? 2000 dollars.
(clapping) Wow, that was so true!
Let's go ahead onto the next one, Alex.
"3-word term in a contract for an unrepreventab-" What?
WHEN IS YOUR IDEAL DAY TO DIE?
I'm gonna have to- Please, I'll give you the money, just stop- Don't say anything-
"Objection"?!
Have you guys ever played Phoenix Wright? It's like a fun...
Hm...
Ha ha, Gumshoe's kinda hot in that game.
Oh my g, you right. You right!
Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up, you big gay bitch!
(buzzer sound)
No money for you.
Uh, go ahead and give me that next one in "Legal A's".
"A document stating your wishes about medical care as you're near the end is a living will or this (direwliwbliwblw)"
Did anyone think Gumshoe in that game was kinda hot, tho?
Yeah! You're right, Rat.
What the. Fuck?
"In Californ-E-I, spousal sup-" What?
Uh, I want it on record that I also think Gumshoe's hot.
Okay, great, awesome! 400 dollars, enjoy.
WHA- HUH?
"Creutzfelt-Jakob disease is a rare but fatal and transmissible brain disease closely related to this bovine in-" What?
Uh, what is "brain bones"?
You're an idiot. But you're only 5 days old and you've got a lot of gumption so we'll give it to you.
"Harry Styles, Harris Mary Styles helped lead-" What? What?? What???
What is "goo-goo ga-ga"? :3
Wh- Daww, so precious! Oh my God, I have to give it to 'em!
And here it comes: Yet another haunted cube.
Are you ready for this little baby Moe?
:3
stoppp
Here it comes!
"william howard taft is among our many dead. in the river styx, you hear his voice." among us?
"you must never look behind you. they will grab you and drag you under-"
What is "I want milkies"? :3
Oh my Goddd!
Oh my g, they're so cute!
Wrong.
...But we'll give you 2000 dollars anyway, you cute little scamp!
Uh, I wanna pet that cat?
There's no cat on there.
This is a man! That's J- William John Denver hte. fourth.
What do you want?!
What is "brain bones", honestly?
I don't know! 1200 dollars!
"A swelling of the salivary glands between the jaw and the ear is the result of this once-common childhood disease."
What is "the common cold".
You can have it! It's still- We still have those, though.
"Diseases", 400.
Wrong.
"Geriatric masterpiece called 'The Raft of' this depicts the aftermath of a shipwreck- ima gamma goron."
Uh, what is "Our Flag Means Death"?
Okay, yeah, whatever.
... You didn't say anything but we're gonna show you this scary picture!
Get scared. Get scared. Get scared.
No!
Scary, scary, scary, scary-!
STOP they're only 5 days old!!
Scary, scary-
Stop!
Oh my God, I'm terrified and traumatized?
Oh my God, that was what I wanted! :D
Traumatize me again! Please.
Okay. I'm- I'm posting that on TikTok.
"Britain-" Britain! Think about England, think about England! Oh my God, you're thinking about British people-
Oh no.
Get scared, get scared, get scared.
Stop, stop, stop! I can't take it anymore-
(demonic) STOP. STOP IT RIGHT NOW.
Okay, 2000 dollars :)
I'm sorry, I was just jokin' around :) hehehe
"From Latin for 'wild beast', it describes a wild, untamed animal, often an un-solicitized h-outdoor cat."
Uh, what is "a wild animal"?
I don't know.
Dang it, what do you mean?
"In type 1 diabetes, the pancakes may no longer produce this hormone that control blood."
Uh, what is "that episode of King of the Hill where Bill got diabetes. Nuts"?
I don't care.
Get scared. Get scared. Get scared. Get scared.
AH!
Stop!
Scary, scary, scary, scary.
AH!!!
Stop, they're only 5 days old! Stop!
Look at the horse, look at the horse, look at the horse!
AH!!!
Scary, scary, scary!
What is "hide that from me, I'm scared"?
Okay, if you say so.
Alright, give me the last column?
"This synonym for 'Gigantic Penis' is derived from the rabies character."
What is "giant penis"?
You're right, you're exactly right.
"It's describes Iron or Steel coated with Zinc."
What-?
What is: "Turgid"?
What? 21,000 dollars.
Oh, yes!
"This 8-letter adjectives mean pertaining to floods, especially the biblical one."
What is: "Philipians-" Wha- Who just burped- during my answer?!
Sorry. Look at this gem!
I-. ...
It looks yummy, right? I wanna put that in my mouth.
Can I eat that?
Yeah, okay.
.
Wow. Well that was just... crazy.
We're going to the map, baby.
If you've ever seen a picture of the entire world, it's like a big circle in the sky, in a big big big big big black ocean.
So, if you wanna look up at the sky-
I thought the Earth was flat!
Nope, it's not!
"It's refered to as 'The Blue Eye of Siberia'." It's called Earth. Y'know?
It's a really beautiful place we live. It's got flowers and oceans and dogs.
What's your favorite flower? My favorite flower is the Siberian...
(realistic baby crying noises)
Horse Olympics. ...Rose. I don't know why they called it that.
I don't know what they're writing down.
Don't pass notes during Jeopardy.
Hey, this kid's crying over here, can somebody like, help them out? It's making me really sad.
No. That's the stress baby. It's so you answer questions. harder.
I'm leaving here with 100 dollars. And a gift card to Applebee's.
I wish I had 100 dollars and a big Applebee's gift card. of 100 dollars.
"The Ural"??
What is "The One Piece".
We dont watch- A thousand-six-? What a random amount!
You're a wacky dude. Fuck you. I'm taking your money away, you fucking weeaboo.
This is FUCKED up.
Uhhh, what about Rat? What's up dog?
What is "Blue-Eyes White Dragon"?
"Lake Vagina"?! Are you crazy??
Yeah, that's- that's what I wrote.
Twelve thou- That's way too much! No! Idiot!
Don't embarass yourself. What's up, bimbo?
THE RECKONING APPROACHES.
"Lake. Bichael"??
"Bankai"!
Bionicles! ...No.
I don't remember how this got in my hand. Remember? It was- It was smaller earlier, now it's a little bigger.
Uh- How much money do you want? 5000 dollars?
Yea, can I have that?
Yeah, we'll give you 5000 dollars, whatever, who cares.
Yes! (happy baby noises)
Awww.
Now he's six days old!
Now he's six days old! Happy birthday!
It just turned to midnight! Happy birthday, Moechael!
Happy birthday!
And we're all so happy for Moe and his 6-day-old birthday. Little clap with my paper.
Yeahh, aww! (singing) Happy birthday to you~
If you wanna go to my website and send me an email,
Happy birthday to you~
And if you wanna, if- If you wanna rescue these peop-
Happy birthday dear Moe~
Are you just gonna keep talking to me? You're gonna keep talking over me?
(gibberish baby noises)
Happyy birthday~ toOoOoOoO youuu~
Wow, you're aging backwards like Benjamin Button but also Meat Wad.
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that's it that's the whole thing 👍 now pretended i animated 15 full minutes of that.